The English Observer
On the banks of the Clyde fairly bursting with pride
Sure the Scot is a terror in tartan,
Like the bagpipe he blows in the face of his foes
At the battle he longs to take part in.
When he's fully engaged with his BLENDED & AGED
Sure the Scot comes alive as he used to,
For it's all that he needs to surpass both the deeds
Of his clan and of Robert the Bruce, too!
Should a lassie undress for a swim in Loch Ness
Sure the Scot will declare "It's a monster!"
And the tourists who laughed are pronounced "bluidy daft"
Though they watched while her laddie ensconced her.
That a man isn't built to be clad in a kilt
Sure the Scot will deny till he freezes,
For his heart is as boldthough his arse be as cold
As the wind of the wild Hebrides is.
©2001 Lewis Bruser
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